


for better or for worse

by hoppnhorn



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-01 15:09:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18802822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hoppnhorn/pseuds/hoppnhorn
Summary: One weekend in Vegas changes Steve's life -- and now he's not sure what he wants.





	for better or for worse

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted as a prompt on tumblr: "Steve’s getting married and Billy’s his best man. Billy has the unfortunate responsibility of letting Steve know he’s about to make the biggest mistake of his life. Insert unrequited love meets harringrove feels. Maybe mutual pining?!" 
> 
> I might expand this, but I'm not sure.

His tuxedo is easily worth more than any suit he’s worn in his life. But his fiancée had insisted.  _Fiancée ._  Steve swallows down the word and shakes his head.  _Wife_. In a matter of minutes, Nancy will be his wife. Together since high school, together in college, and now together forever. 

Steve looks up at himself in the mirror and wonders why that realization sits on his chest like a ton of bricks. Nancy is kind, strong, brave, and fun. He likes.. no  _loves_  her. 

“Shit.” He wipes a hand over his face, fighting back the nervous sweat that starts to slick his forehead. “What the hell am I doing?” 

 _Marrying the wrong person._  Steve closes his eyes and knows he’s on the edge of screaming. The edge of losing his goddamn mind. All because of one night. The night his neat, organized, little life had exploded in his lap like a landmine and turned his brain into a crater. 

The night he’d slept with his best friend. 

Steve stumbles back from the mirror and sits in a chair, breathing hard as the images bombard him. His best friend. His  _best man_ , for fuck’s sake. Billy. Billy fucking Hargrove. 

 

 

Billy had brought him nothing but trouble since the day he’d blasted into Hawkins, Indiana. Golden skinned, smirking and as fucked up as they come. He and Steve had butted heads until the last few months of their senior year. 

It’s funny how the end of the world brings people together. 

Billy had fallen headfirst into the fray along with the rest of the Party, fighting for their lives while all sorts of horror had descended on their sleepy town. Steve and Billy found out they made a better team than they did enemies and when the smoke had cleared, a friendship formed. They wound up at the same college, close enough that they could keep tabs on their nerdy little flock of teenagers. Steve and Nancy got back together after Jonathan left for NYU. Everything went back to normal. Smooth sailing. 

Then Vegas had happened. 

Las  _fucking_  Vegas. Of course that had been Billy’s idea. Because all of their stupid stories and terrible plans were Billy’s ideas. He was the trouble maker. He was the wild child. Steve was the rational one. Steve was the adult. But he’d let Billy talk him into a weekend of gambling and clubbing and chaos, all in the name of bachelorhood. 

The first night had gone well. They went out on the town with some of their buddies from school, got plastered, and spent far too much money. Nancy had called their hotel room at 8am and Steve had barely been able to hold a conversation he’d been so hungover. But it didn’t stop him from going out the next night and doing it all over again. 

Maybe if he’d taken Nancy’s advice and “ _take it easy for a night. Go see a show”_ he wouldn’t have wound up with Billy, stumbling down a hotel hallway at four in the morning and laughing like they weren’t being loud as hell. Steve had been warm and happy and more relaxed than he’d felt in years. Since before  the whole world had turned Upside Down. 

When they’d stumbled back into their room, Steve had fallen face first into one of the two double beds, cackling at the way he’d tripped on his own feet. And Billy had fumbled around, trying to find his room key, which was still stuck in the door. They laughed about that until Billy was toppling over onto Steve’s bed. Then his best friend had rolled over, eyes twinkling and cheeks flushed, and said four words. 

“God, I love you.” 

Steve hadn’t been able to speak so he had just stared. Stared and breathed and sobered up faster than ever before. Billy had grinned, waved a hand in front of his face, and giggled like maybe it’d been a big joke. But Steve had seen the way his expression had slipped, for just a moment, and his heart had shone through. So he’d grabbed Billy by the front of his shirt and kissed him. Kissed him, slipped him his tongue, carded his fingers through Billy’s curly hair. In one breathless moment, something inside of Steve broke. 

They fucked on that double bed without uttering a single word. Billy opened his legs, Steve filled him up, and they came together like it was meant to be. They moved greedily against each other, sharing breath and sweat. 

It was ecstasy and then it was done. 

Steve had spent the rest of the night staring at the ceiling from his bed. Billy had showered and caught an early flight. And they never spoke of it again. 

 

 

Steve shudders as he stares down at the rings in his palm. One is small, so small he doubts it’d even fit on his pinky. It’s fitted for Nancy’s delicate finger. It was made for her to wear until the day she dies. 

A knock on the dressing room startles him from his study and he shakes his head. 

“Yeah?” 

The door opens quickly and Billy is suddenly standing there, a big grin on his face. 

“Man, you should see the fucking  _HAT_  on your mom’s head.” He snorts and immediately bolts for the mirror, playing with his hair. He’s had it cut just for the wedding and Steve can tell he hates it. But he’d done it for Steve. 

Always for Steve.

He looks back down at the rings as his stomach turns sour. Billy’s loved him for years. He knows now, looking back at the memories. He’s always known and it makes his heart  _bleed_. 

“You okay?” Billy asks, glancing at him in the mirror. “Need me to take those now?” He turns around with a palm outstretched and Steve wants to punch him in the face. Wants to scream and kick and bash his fists into the mirror until the pain he feels paints the walls. Instead he nods and drops the rings into his friend’s palm. 

“Hey.” Billy steps closer, crouches down until he’s staring him in the face. “What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing.” Steve defaults, the word rushing out of his mouth before he can stop it. Billy searches his eyes and Steve knows he sees the lie. But he doesn’t call him on it. He simply nods and stands. 

“Well, show’s about to start so the groom better put on a smile.” 

The words slice Steve to the bone and he watches his own expression collapse in the mirror as Billy opens the door to leave. His hands are shaking as he grabs his best friend’s arm. His best man. 

 _Billy._  

“I can’t do this.” He whispers. His voice is wet and pathetic and he gulps back a mouth full of thick saliva. Billy stiffens in his hold and the door closes softly. 

“Don’t say that.”

“I can’t…” Steve fights back a sob. He will not cry. He refuses to cry. But the pain in his chest and the burn of tears in his eyes strangle the words in his throat, hold them captive. Billy finally looks back at him. 

“You don’t mean it.”

“Billy-” Steve shakes his head as a shudder rips through him. “I can’t…”

“You’re just nervous.” Billy says and the words are cold. Sterile. Steve looks up and sees the mask. The mask Billy wears when he’s pushing his real emotions into a corner and roping them off.

“I’m not nervous!” Steve snaps, his anger breaking through the tightness in his chest. “Fuck, Billy. I look at those rings and I think about what it means and I…” He suddenly can’t stand the sight of Billy’s calm, collected face and he closes his eyes. Maybe if he waits long enough, he’ll wake up in that bed in Las Vegas. “…I can’t marry Nancy.” 

He says the words precisely, articulates slowly. But he doesn’t dare open his eyes. 

“It’d be so easy.” He breathes, a rush of tears falling down his cheeks. “So easy to just stand up there and repeat the words.” 

His lashes are thick with tears when he opens his eyes. Billy is staring down at the floor like a statue. 

“But I think about it and it makes me want to throw up.” Steve groans. “I feel like I’m falling and I can’t breathe because I know if I go up there and I marry Nancy, I’ll…” He pants and his heart whispers the words he’s so afraid to say aloud. But he steadies himself, takes a small step towards his best friend. His  _best_  friend. “I’ll lose you.”

Billy’s shoulders hunch and his eyes clamp shut, nose wrinkled in an expression of agony that Steve feels in his gut. Deep in his gut. When Billy looks up, his mask is gone and tears shine in his eyes. 

“You fucking idiot.” Billy murmurs. “You can’t lose me.” Steve can’t breathe as his best man scoffs. “I’m yours.”

Steve grabs Billy by the back of the neck and the guy closes the space between them with a pull on Steve’s jacket. With their foreheads pressed together, they just hold on to one another. 

“Always have been yours, Harrington.” Billy whispers, tears escaping from the corner of his right eye. Steve wipes them away with a hand and lets out a little, wet laugh. “Always.”


End file.
